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When Burnout Becomes Depression: My Story of Breaking and Beginning Again
- Edith C.
- Oct 10
- 3 min read
I remember a few years ago crying hysterically in my bathtub as I kept repeating to myself,
“I understand, I understand, I understand.”
It felt like my brain was on a loop. I blurted those words out of my throat as everything inside me sunk.
I was speaking them to my ex-fiancé, Ben. And in that moment, I finally understood the kind of pain that leads someone to see death as relief.
The Moment Everything Collapsed
All the signs he had shown before his suicide—I began to see in myself.
The inability to commit to anything, not even a relationship or job.
The loss of joy from things that once brought me light.
The endless mental troubleshooting: Am I getting better? What else can I try?
The racing heart when an intrusive thought landed.
The insomnia.
The fatigue.
The doctor visits that always ended in “normal results” while I felt anything but.
The tension behind my right eye.
The nosebleeds.
The stomach pain.
The sense that something had broken in me—and I would never be fixed.
What I didn’t realize then was that I wasn’t just burned out. I was in a deep depression, camouflaged by my productivity and my will to “try one more thing.”
The Fine Line Between Burnout and Depression
Burnout and depression often dance together.
Burnout begins as emotional and physical exhaustion from prolonged stress—often from caregiving, perfectionism, or relentless responsibility. Depression takes root when that exhaustion turns into hopelessness, when the body no longer believes rest will make a difference.
The two share many symptoms: fatigue, insomnia, loss of pleasure, and detachment. But depression carries an added weight—a loss of meaning, a belief that nothing will change.
Understanding this overlap was life-saving for me. Burnout recovery wasn’t about returning to my old pace; it was about rebuilding my relationship with rest, my body, and my purpose.
What Healing Looked Like for Me
Healing wasn’t linear or polished. It began with micro-moments:
Sitting in silence with my breath when my mind wanted to run.
Allowing tears to come without analyzing them.
Taking walks without the goal of “exercise.”
Learning that I could be still and still be enough.
Seeing my therapist weekly
Having at few non-judgmental, safe, kind people to process my feelings
Slowly, I began to sense life returning—not as excitement, but as gentleness.
I learned that burnout recovery is a grief process: grieving the version of yourself that could push through, and learning to honor the one who now needs softness.
Creating Rituals for Renewal
Out of that season, Lotus Love Box was born—a small practice of care that grew into a healing business. When I couldn’t find the energy to speak, light, scent, and touch became my prayers.
That’s why I created the Burnout Self-Care Box—a collection inspired by Yoga Nidra, or yogic sleep. Each item—a candle, crystal, aromatherapy, and grounding tools—was chosen to help others reconnect to their body’s wisdom and rediscover rest as medicine.
Because healing isn’t about doing more; it’s about remembering that you’re allowed to stop.
✨ An Invitation to Begin Again
If you’re reading this and recognizing yourself in my story—please know: you’re not broken. Your body is communicating its need for care, not punishment.
Create space to rest. To cry. To breathe. To not know.
And if you’d like a tangible way to start that ritual of restoration, I invite you to explore the Burnout Self-Care Gift Box — a gentle companion for your recovery journey.
🕯️ Light the candle. Breathe. Let rest be your rebellion.
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